Ok I was going to keep this one to myself but its been gnawing at me. So last night I had this dream. Ya know one of those real life like type dreams that you remember as if it was happening in real time. I was watching "Why did I get married too" cuz it was late and Tyler Fairy always puts me to sleep. Next thing I know God appears in front of me. not the first time. We're cool like that. He says "Darz (yeah he calls me Darz) whats your problem? Im like "What problem?" He said "Im asking the questions!! Mind if I be in charge for awhile? Thank you very much!!!" I roll my eyes but not so he can see them which is dumb cuz God sees all. Anyway he asks why am I still single. I say "I dont know. Enjoying life alone and having fun. Plus Im not ready." Just then he raises his index finger and pow!! Lightning bolt to the forehead. "I was like God damn!!" He was like "Yeah??" I was like (with all the likes I say think valley ghetto boy) "What was that for?" He said "I created you in my own image and gave you a companion made from your own body so that you may..." I cut him off "Yadda yadda yadda!! Whatever!! been there done that. Lasted 15 years, a house and a whole lot of money. I only go down the wrong road once. Feel me??" Once again he raises his index finger but before I get the lightning bolt I jump into the fetal position and shout "Dont tase me bro!!!" The lord our God starts cracking up and says "Thats my fave Youtube video!!" Anyway he instructs me to try again and lays down a set of rules I should follow. I started to get smart mouthed and tell him look at where his commandments got us but felt I dodged getting tased once so why try my luck. So he says he has to go but will be back to check on my progress. He said "its time to shit or get off the pot. Fish or cut bait." So with that said...... IDK...:)
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